Author: Ashley

Sometimes time drifts away from you. Sometimes your desire to write disappears. Sometimes the words of a poem abandon your heart. Sometimes you forget. Whatever the case may be, here I am again after a bit of time away. Life is constantly happening and things slip through the cracks as the ups and downs see bigger hills, then on the small ones, you get exhausted. This is a brief synopsis of my life since this summer. Any poems I reference will be shared in posts to come.

I am going to make this part very short, as there is a lot of tension and anger in the family, as well as grief concerning these next facts. Grandma passed on January 6th, funeral on January 10th. Liver cancer. Grandpa passed on March 10th, funeral on March 21st. Influenza A, effecting his heart (he had a pacemaker); refused to get treated saying it will only leave him with issue after issue. The grief process is new to me. Moments of peace, moments of anger, moments of tears, moments of frustration, moments of confusion, moments of numbness. Lots and lots of tension.

Ash Wednesday. I was simply touch by the actions of the dad of a family that I will sometimes sit with. He simply put my kneeler down for me once, and another time put it up for me. It really struck a cord with me as someone who typically goes to Mass on my own. One might argue I don’t go alone, so I will say that I tend to sit alone. Being near families with great values and faith gives me hope.

Back in October, we were given to opportunity through my parish to go on a pilgrimage to a few shrines in Wisconsin, fully paid for via an endowment that was started for the spiritual formation of parishioners. It was beautiful and I enjoyed every moment, even in the couple moments of tears.

Mid March, there was another opportunity that was given to us at my parish. We were able to go on retreat at a place called Trinity Woods in Trego, WI. It was put on and led by our priest and a few of the parish staff members. I cannot even begin to tell you how amazing that retreat was. There were sorrows poured out, joy shared, so many encounters. The retreat theme was Encounter, so I suppose there is no surprise there. We even had an afternoon, from 12-4 (then through the talk at 4), of silence. I took the opportunity the walk the many (hilly) trails. In this time of retreat, I wrote five poems. Five! These will appear in future posts. This time away to focus on encountering God, myself, and others, was very needed and I could have stayed in retreat mode for ever! One of the blessings of this retreat occurred when we boarded the bus to go home. It was then that I found out that grandpa was in the hospital. The love and affection that was shown to me in that we offered him up in petition during our Divine Mercy Chaplet. I have also been blessed to have some of those from the retreat, most especially my small group, check in on me. This is the reminder I was given from one of the church staff, which I cherish. “Remember, everything that happened on the retreat is real. Any of the current circumstances do not change that fact!”

Here I leave you now. Look ahead to posts including poems I have written with reminders of their sources. God bless!